Me: Jesus Christ I'm due for a haircut. I'm kinda holding off because I went to a barber last time and he made me look hideous. I need to start going back to the stylist.
Dave: I don't know why you don't go to a barber. I go to a barber.
Me: Yeah, but you don't care about how you look.
Dave: Heh heh heh heh, I think I look good; and so does my girlfriend.
Me: Oh, the one who won't marry you?
Dave: Shut up!
Me: Yeah, so again I'm insane. I walked down the block to the new barber and there was one person ahead of me. The desk guy told me I'd have to wait 30 minutes so I told him I'd come back. He panicked and tried to get me to reconsider. He then said it would only be 20 minutes but I assured him that I didn't have that kind of time. As I'm walking out he tried to get me to make an appointment but I just walked out the door.
Dave: My barber only does cuts by appointment. He's a former marine.
Me: Yeah, you've told me about that guy.
Dave: Yeah, I think he's a total fag.
Me: I'm surprised you allow him to cut your hair.
Dave: Eh, he's alright. He just loves to hug me a lot.
Me: Maybe he likes you.
Dave: No! He knows better.
Me: Are you sure?
Dave: I hope so.
Me: So do I.