Dave: I got 19 turkeys for Obeson's First Communion.
Me: Wow, that's a lot of turkeys.
Dave: Hey, if you have kids are you going to raise them Catholic?
Me: Oh, hell no. Fuck no.
Worker #3: Ha, ha, ha.
Me: I ain't having them baptized or any of that shit. Fuck that.
Dave: Are you going to have them circumcised?
Me: I don't know. That kinda seems barbaric.
Dave: It's just one more thing to wash.
Me: And I don't even know how to teach my kid how to clean it.
Dave: The people who don't get circumcised have the same doctors as pigs.
Worker #3: What!? I'm not circumcised. Am I a pig?
Dave: They're pigs.
Worker #3: What's wrong with this guy? I'm a pig? Should they round us up and put us down?
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