Me: Oh yeah? That's good you got out.
Dave: Yeah, so this girl comes over at like 1:30 - and she's wicked drunk. I mean, she's like falling over - and she comes over and she's all hanging on my arm.
Me: Oh yeah?
Dave: And she's wicked cute too.
Me: Of course.
Dave: So the bouncer comes over and asks me if I want him to escort her out. I know the guy and I tell him she's fine, but then my girlfriend lurches across me to tell him to get her the fuck out of here so he takes her away.
Me: Aw, too bad.
Dave: But I go out on the beach to get some fresh air later right, and while I'm out there I hear some moaning. So I'm looking around to find out where it's coming from and I see it's that broad that got thrown out. She's face down in the sand passed out.
Me: I know where this is going.
Dave: He he, so I go over to where she is and she's all fucked up.
Me: Rough shape.
Dave: Yeah, so I pull out my dick. I'm gonna fuck this broad. She was cute.
Me: I know. You said that already.
Dave: So I'm standing over her when I hear, "Dave! Dave! What the fuck are you doing over there?" It's my girlfriend; she came looking for me. I told her I was taking a piss, "do you mind?"
Me: Smart.
Dave: Yeah, then she comes over and sees the drunk bitch there and says, "You were gonna fuck her weren't you!?"
Me: And you were.
Dave: Yeah but she didn't know that. I was gonna fuck her so hard. Stick it in her ear. Her mouth. I was gonna cum in her hair.
Me: That's called rape y'know.
Dave: Eh, not really.
your coworker, or one of my family members. yikes either way.
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